{ and we'll play summer on repeat;

Sunday, March 30, 2008

hello, old friend. 3:48 AM

so I took off my shoes and I walked into the woods;
I felt lost and found with every step I took.
----

today was excellente.

I went for Heartbeat for the first time in a long time yet; and after service, Manda and I stayed back to help with fundraising for missions.
... Waffffffles.
I; am proud to be able to say that I can now add "waffle-making" to my otherwise limited cooking repertoire.
And. I can make a mean waffle.

so I spread waffles and Manda bagged 'em and Sue-Anne publicized 'em and people bought 'em and I got swindled into taking over Jared's waffle-spreading shift. Which, all things considered, was a good thing-- cause I'm pretty generous with my waffle toppings.
I must've put, like, half a tub of Nutella on each waffle.
And I had a peanut butter waffle for lunch was which mmmm. Prepared, of course, by Manda and my own fair hands.

... Heartbeat raised a total of about 4k!
Aaaand to top it all off-- somebody approached our waffle stall and said that they would give us a dollar for every dollar we made.
Which was just wowwwww.
God works in awesome, awesome ways.

Zhongmin (Ethan? in lieu of this being your baptism name, I'm gonna use it) invited me to go for the Zouk flea market with him and his friend; so after the waffle-making session; Nick, Ethan and I headed down to Zouk to looksee.
... The place was seething with people. I kid you not.
Nick went to do some hardcore shirt-hunting; so Ethan and I wandered around the place.
... Actually- "shuffle and worm our way through the place" would probably be more accurate. I tried on these really funky aviator glasses and an old army cap but eventually we gave up on shopping and focused all our attention on navigating our way around the people.
And then we stumbled upon this really cool fountainesque/outside-washroom area. It was like something from a scene from The Little Mermaid.
the taps were wicked cool.
"let's just stay here for the rest of the time and play with the taps!"
... and the gigantic aquamarine mirror was awesome;
"looook it feels like you can just walk into it."

then we went to face the masses again.

"i wonder if Nick's still alive."

so when Nick was done; we went outside to meet him, and he was standing there with this rad blue and green necklace around his neck and grinning.

"ohhh groovy necklace!"

"...yeah? it's for you."

I love my new necklace, thank you Nick. :D it's all blue and green and island shop-esque and it looks like it's made out of oversized turquoise lifesavers, mm.

... So Nick went off to meet his cousins, and then Ethan and I went to Cine to try and scout out Comicsmart. (it had been killed by Revoltage. :/)
so we went to Subway and split a meal. and the biggest diet coke I've ever seen.

"cool. so you actually eat."
"yeaaahh I'm a firm advocate of food!"

and I'm an oatmeal-and-raisin convert.

And the arcade. Oh gosh, the arcade.
The last time I'd been there was eons ago.
I wanted to play House of the Dead; but it was out of order-- so we raced on Daytona instead. I came in 20th and he came in 30th. ... Goooo us! We're the next Kimi Raikkonens, oh yes we are.
and then we played DDR. never again. i don't want to talk about it.
aaand then came air hockey, which was crazy fun and at which I was totally owned.

busrides talking about Twilight and places we've been and how awesome the London culture is.
... another person who says I'd probably be able to pull off being Bella.
hmm.

he came over and my sister roped him into playing Game of Life with her.
which was pretty funny; I liked being the audience.

oh and a brown paper bag with the "oh golly goodness!" logo on it and a hot pink mr. roboto hand mirror inside-- thank you!
a keepsake to remember how we survived the mass of humanity at the zouk flea market.

so yeah.
today was puhretty rad.

waffles zouk subway arcade lifesaver-necklace awesome conversation mr.roboto talking about bella and edward game of life.

what could be better?

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

hello, old friend. 5:59 AM

and the rangers scream out to the cabins
they are the hunters and we are the rabbits
maybe we don't want to be found,
maybe we don't want to be found
----

NJ's first ever swimming carnival!

The Fourckers' relay team: Divij, WQ, Qiu and I.
Aaaand we were surrounded (on all sides!) by teams and teams and teams of sporty people. If they weren't sporty, then they were reaaaally competitive, and sometimes they were both.

so we decided to just go there and have fun.

mission accomplished: I had such an awesome tyyyyyyme.

I love my Qiulynna. (: We were shackled together for one of the games and I killed our balloon baby and almost fell into the pool before the game started and I laughed so hard that we could hardly finish the game,
and the moment we reached the finish line; she fell over with a very unglam "oof!"
and since my legs were shackled to hers, I fell over too,
and then the both of us sat there for about a minute just laughing and laughing.

Captain's ball in the water is zeh fun. Maxy and Ting make awesome cheerleaders; jumping up and down at the side: "goooo Caraaaaa!"
and me screaming, "omigosh Divij come here come here come heeeeere!" whenever somebody got too close to the goal,
and Becky and I lunging for the ball at the same time, and the subsequent few seconds of thrashing and wrestling that ensued,
and the guys in my team stopping to hoot, "woo, catfight!".

Reuben won almost all of his races without even trying. :/
And I saw Wen Loong and he turned a few shades darker, I swear. He was paler this morning, but by the end of the afternoon he had turned golden.

sitting on the bleachers with Qiu and singing along to every song we know;

"your voice was the soundtrack of my summer
do you know you're unlike any other?
you're always be my thunder, and I said:
your eyes were the brightest of all the colours
I don't want to ever love another-"

"he's everything you want; he's everything you need
he's everything inside of you that you wish you could be
he says all the right things, at exactly the right time;
but he means nothing to you, and you don't know why"

"we already know how it ends tonight
you run in the dark through a firefight
and I would explode just to save your life,
I would explode,"

we have rock hair. >;D

... Team relay event!
"let's just go in there and do our thing."
So we did.
When it came to my turn, I decided I didn't want to plunge in or dive in from the diving board; so I just hopped into the pool with my shirt on, went underwater, and started swimming.
aaaaaand the four of us were awesome awesome awesome, I love you guys.

After we came out of the pool, RJ ran up to us with a commentary and this is what she said:
"Caraaaa you held your breath for so long! When it came to your turn, we were looking for you and we couldn't see you and we were all, 'oh man, Cara forgot her turn," and we were waiting and waiting until suddenly we saw a head of black hair bob up and go down again, and then disappear for another loooong time. you must've held your breath for twenty seconds!"

*grins*
... Water elemental, 'member.

We dunked RJ at the end of the carnival-- she put up one of the toughest struggles ever, and clung onto the flag pole; but then she let go (why'd you let go? it's your fault!) and Maxy reached out one hand and gave a leeetle push, and

splash, goes RJ.

yay for splash and dash or whatever it is that our carnival's called.

... oh yesterday Wen Loong borrowed Eclipse from me,
WQ intends to extort Twilight from him,
and we saw Johnson burying his face in Eclipse on the way to the canteen.

Yay everyone's going Twilight crayzeeeee.

And I swear I had nothing to do with it. :D
Really!

we've come up with our very own Twilight cast; and while it's incomplete, it's pretty rad.

hurrah, life!

all for love, we become
larger than lifesize, wondersome.

God, how I've grown to love you, and you, and you, and, you.

Monday, March 24, 2008

hello, old friend. 8:37 AM

"we're burning down the city skyline
on the back of a hurricane that started turning
back when you were young,"
---

I've realized that I've got Global Talktime to use up on my phone, and I want to use it before it expires or does something equally as nasty-- so tonight, after finishing my homework, I am going to call Roy over there in the Netherlands and we shall have a good catching-up session.

We had a trial run, just now. It felt weird-- hearing someone's voice so close; when you know very well that the said person's all the way over in some completely different country.
The last time I had that feeling was back in Breckenridge, when I made a call back to Singapore. It felt so weeeird sitting in the snow with my skis next to me and my breath making dragon-swirls in the air, while hearing a voice so far from me-- echoing just next to my ear.

After training today; Wen Loong, WQ and I stayed in school for a while more, and watched Twilight/New Moon/Eclipse vids.
"he doesn't look a thing like Jesus; but he talks just like a gentleman."
That line from The Killers is ze schtuck in my head. :/ I'm getting used (baby steps!) to Robert Pattinson being Edward Cullen, although I'd still prefer Gaspard Ulliel/Henry Cavill/Tom Sturridge. And I have forgiven Taylor Lautner for looking so misleadingly scrawny in Sharkboy. At least now he's got some semblance of flesh.

The three of us have fallen irrevocably in love with Near To You.
It's a beautiful, beautiful video.
When it ended, there was this reverent silence-- then, very slowly, we all began to breathe again, and- almost in unison- breathed an awed whisper: "...wow."

There're just certain things-- songs, a verse caught over the radio, a picture, a book-- that make you take a step back, and look at yourself, and really, really LOOK at yourself.

and once that happens, the only thing you can say, really, is "...wow." (!)
Because you see everything.
You see the pain, the joy, the hope, the hopelessness, the loneliness, the loveliness, and the vulnerability of it all,
and you realize that your life might possibly be the most beautiful, most tragic, most breathtaking thing ever created.

... Definitely worth watching till the finish.

And if you've the time-- track down the lyrics. Likely you won't regret it.

... "Near To You" has been spinning around in my head all day and on my lips, and if ever I become a youtube queen or a worldfamous celebrity, I shall do a cover of this song and dedicate it to Memories and People and Strength.

... aight. Now to finish up Partial Fractions and think of my plot for the Chinese essay tomorrow;
and then the Netherlands and blue-eyes are just a phonecall away.

Namarie, loves!

Saturday, March 22, 2008

hello, old friend. 12:47 AM

and you're wearing the same shirt that you wore last week,
should I shake your hand or should I kiss your cheek?
----

hello.

I watched Pocahontas the other day.
I got strange looks from the counterguy at Video Ezy when I asked them if they had Pocahontas.

"you mean the cartoon?"
" yes."
"... you mean the old Disney cartoon? The one for kids?"
"... ummm. Yes."

I love Disney.
I don't care if you don't believe in fairies; don't believe that every girl's a princess; don't believe in happily ever after; don't believe that wishes can and do and will come true if you let them--
-- I do.

which is why I will never really grow up.

which is fine by me.

today I was scrolling through my internet history, and I found this.
... Edward, and Bella.
I wish Gaspard Ulliel was Edward. :/ But I'm guessing he was too arts-housey for the kind of Twilight movie they wanted to make.

... brings back memories, doesn't it?
but I still love that video.
just maybe for different reasons, now.

The sky's a lovely grey, now.
I'm glad I had my swim, already- I took myself to the pool after we'd finished training. I knew I was psychic.
Making believe that we're mermaids is fun. :D And today I found out that I'm not the only one who does that. I've found a fellow mermaid-pool-buddy in Qiu.
One day, love, we'll go for a lovely long swim and I'll show you where Atlantica is.

dear sky, please rain.
I haven't danced in the rain for ages now.

funny how the days go by.
funny how the weather changes.
funny how the old polaroid moves me less.
funny how the feeling seems to fade.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

hello, old friend. 7:02 AM

we are the lucky ones
we shine like a thousand suns
when all of the colour runs together,
------

I was never really one for thursdays; but tomorrow's shall be pretty bearable.
school, recording studio, down for a swim, then body combat.

... Speaking of swimming; my hair's becoming brown.
My hair never does what it's supposed to do. [/fumes] ... When I made an attempt at dying it brown with henna two years ago, it stayed irrevocably black; and now when I didn't ask it to, it's started turning brown.

Which reminds me of the Disney Girls' Club a group of friends and I used to have back then, a few years ago; and every morning we would meet at the Fairy Ring at the back of a field. I was Ariel back then; so one morning I came traipsing towards the Fairy Ring with the morning sun streaming onto my face, and everyone in the Ring did a double take and gasped, "... your hair's auburn!" and I was so thrilled.

But moving back to swimming-- I've had to give running a rest for a while, and turn to alternative forms of exercise.
S'not just my shin splint now-- the other day, I took a fall on my balcony. Aaand landed facedown (literally)-- just that my knee took the most of the beating.
Fortunately, though; I fell the wrong way, so I narrowly missed tumbling off the roof. (don't ask me why I was on the roof-- it's a nice place to listen to music, s'all.)

RJ: "... Stupid Caaaarl. Who falls the wrong way off a balcony?"
Me: "... Well-- would you rather I had fallen the right way?!"

so now my shin hurts and my knee hurts and I can't run well, dangit Cara, why'd you always have t'go and put your foot in it?
... ooh pun.

... I've realized that I've taken a liking to swimming, though.
I'm not the fastest swimmer around (by faaaar); and I'd hate to swim competitively-- but there's just something about being in the water that I find completely soothing; completely healing.
Maybe s'cause I'm a water elemental.
And as much as I miss running now-- I suppose running IS a rather fire/earth(?) dominated sport.
So it's good to get back to one's roots now and then. ('scuse the Earth elemental term)

... I love Lea Salonga.
I watched her audition video on youtube, for MIss Saigon; and her voice was stellar, even at 17.

oh, and I think there are fairies in my room.
the other morning I was sitting at my desk and starting to feel a little warm; then the airconditioning suddenly switched itself on, of its own accord.
Strangely enough, I wasn't freaked out-- so I went to look for the aircon remote control; and it was on my bed, at the other side of the room.

awesome, no?

I still remember when my little sister and I used to leave flower petals and cool water out for the fairies.

when I am grown up and have a home of my own, I shall never ever ever plant a rowan tree outside my house; even if I can.
Instead, I shall plant periwinkles and weeping willow trees and leave petals and water around the garden; and my children shall grow up with fairies and wood nymphs as playmates.

now, back into my room.

I shall listen to Lea Salonga and Becky Taylor and Hayley Westenra, and catch up with a few friends; and prepare for a lovely thursday tomorrow, and a lovelier friday.

thank you, week, for being kind.

Sunday, March 16, 2008

hello, old friend. 12:10 AM

the light collects and projects your heart onto a movie screen
and if you close your eyes, we are always going to be that way-
the way we were that night.

-----

speak now or hold your peace in pieces.

(maybe i've left you a piece of me
and maybe one day we'll carve it into a key
or maybe one day you'll use it as a shard; breathe deep, press down hard
but maybe one day we'll carve it into a key)

I love listening to Rilo Kiley:
"and all the immediate unknowns are better than knowing
this tired and lonely fate
Does he love you?
does he love you?
Will he hold your tiny face in his hands?"

... something tells me I might not want to hear the answer.

maybe eighteen. maybe a day. maybe never. maybe forever.
-- who knows? ... only Time.

so.

goodbye, stranger in the night.

thank you for the bad, for the beautiful,
for the memories.

(love, me.)

Friday, March 14, 2008

hello, old friend. 11:23 PM

I was heading down to Spring Street
with a suitcase in my hand
I'm feeling love and life and grand disillusions
I knew you'd understand
(and I left you by the stairwell)
----

I shall never date a weatherman. :/

Cloudy, my foot.
The sky's so blue outside; it feels like I'm on some kinduv Barbie Goes To Malibu set.

but yeah, today's been puhretty okay so far.
Teh grandmama dropped by in the morning with my favouritest organic apples (!),which was a nice way to start the day, and then she gave me a lift to Body Combat.

which, as always, was awesome.

I talked to Kevin again. He liked my butterfly.

"... did you know you're really pretty?"
"aww, gee, thanks."
"I bet lots of people'll show up to your Combat classes next time. you've got the drive."

... I wasn't really sure what exactly "the drive" refers to-- but let's be presumptious and say it's a good thing; so...
... awww.

moving on.
Lately, my mum's been on some kinda health kick.
Aaaand I just realized that I actually like the shakes she makes us drink- which, according to the bottle- contains barley grass, wheatgrass, chlorella, kelp, and brown rice.
yeah and I actually like that stuff.
how freaky is that?!
verrrrry.

But it's been fun playing mommy for the past few days, since the 'rents have been overseas.
... Okay, so maybe I haven't been the best of moms, 'specially considering I've been out a whole lot-- but I'm getting the hang of it. Now all I need are my Juicy sweatpants and my sunnies and a grande Long Black, and I'll be good t'go.

Ting borrowed my Flowers For Algernon and I just realized that I probably have L.A on Monday, so I've been relegated to doing my research on sparknotes.com.

I've been getting tired pretty easily, lately.
I was so tired that I decided to give dance a miss. And Claribel's gonna kill me. She's probably going t'do some crazy hip-shimmy and shimmy me off (with my coinbelt and harem pants) to the Raks Sharki Bootcamp For Bad Girls or something equally as bad.

... All right now; homework calls. I've decided to finish aaaall of my work today; so I can get up early for a swim tomorrow, then take J&J to go watch The Spiderwick Chronicles.

go me.

I would so trump Katie Holmes or Posh Spice; any day.

hello, old friend. 7:09 AM

waiting it's a promise
waiting it's a dare
----

MAXINE IS ALIVEEEEE.

yes that's right. surprise, no? ... well, she is.

She was (finally!) contactable today. After dozens of calls she never returned and lots of cajoling.

last night was nice. My little sister and I got on garageband and recorded our very own albummmm. Aly & AJ-- watch out. you're not gonna know what hit you.

I <3 DECLAN GALBRAITH.
Hello angel, your voice enchants me. Omigosh I wish my sister would date him. :/ Guys who sing are so hot; never mind if they're little-- he's gonna grow up someday anyways.

today was nice too. I like having butterflies on my cheek. <3

Ting called me out at noon today, and I started out feeling pretty grumpy because it wasn't Cloudy With Showers as predicted.

I wonder how the weatherman's lover ever believes him.

Howeverrrr, the day got progressively better. We looked at pretty dresses and little kitschy things, and people-watched and drank Diet Coke, and life seems a whole lot simpler when it's been broken down into little speech bubbles.

dinner was funnnn.
I love stories! especially sharing funny canoeist stories.
Maxy is a gewd drama queen. And I cannot wait to be part of Ting's life-to-come!
three cheers for low-key love.
somehow drama always seems to find its way into my life.

maybe it's destined to be that way.
maybe not.
I don't know.

maybe it's the whole
Cara Catastrophe, Tracy Turmoil, Hieu Hazard, Ren Jean Renegade, Ashwyn Armageddon
thing.

(silence.)

whew I'm exhausted.
need to recuperate.

I'll update some other time, loves. <3

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

hello, old friend. 7:12 AM

someone bite me, quick.

you know something weird's going on when they cast

Cedric Diggory as Edward Cullen,

and

Shark Boy as Jacob Black.

oh. my. gosh.

*dies*

Monday, March 10, 2008

hello, old friend. 6:49 AM

summer secrets keep me breathing;
----

warning: long post ahead.
aaand major picture overload.

hurrah for day-overs!

hurrah, hurrah. we are the bomb diggity. :D

The attire today was pjs; so I walked out of the house in my universal studios sleepy tanktop and my pajama pants and my sister's pink Barbie duffel bag and the unicorn plushie that Maxy gave me back in primary school.
got a whole lotta stares. I was kinduv worried that going around Singapore in pjs might be some kinduv criminal offence. don't wanna spend my sixteenth behind bars!

Anywayyy.

At RJ's house! we kicked everything off by watching Sleepover. Qiu and I were squealing incessantly over the guy who acts as Alexa Vega's love interest. The look on his face whenever he catches sight of her is so sweettt. Just this look of complete, absolute mesmerization.
oh gosh. don't we all wish we had that.
Then we watched Sugar and Spice; and did our own impromptu cheerleading routine around RJ's living room. Go us! We'd make fantabulous cheerleaders, not.
I can't believe RJ thinks the guy in Sugar and Spice is cute. Somebody needs to buy him a razor.

then we went into RJ's room and fiddled around with her guitar, and vandalized each other with charcoal face masks.
... Wooga. We'd give Steven Strait a run for his money in 10 000 BC, oh yes.

... we did the Soundtrack Of Your Life quiz! which was awesome. Omigosh. I shall post my results here.

***
(instructions: put your ipod on shuffle.)

Opening Credits: Let Love In (Goo Goo Dolls)
"you're the only one I ever believed in
the answer that could never be found
The moment you decided to let love in;
Now I'm banging on the door of an angel,
the end of fear is where we begin,
the moment you decided to let love in."

Waking Up: You Are The Music In Me (HSM)

First Day Of School: Crazy Frog
I was immensely unhappy with this result. ...I mean, honestly. The one song I canNOT stand?! yeah, thanks.

Falling In Love: Innocent (Our Lady Peace)
"we are, we are all innocent,
we are all innocent,
we are, we are..."

Fight Song: Because You Live
... Guess that means I'm gonna be fighting for someone. Whoa-uh.

Breaking Up: When I'm With You (Faber Drive)
... We all came close to crying when we saw this result. Love this song.

"when I'm with you, I'll make every second count
Cause I miss you whenever you're not around
When I kiss you; I still get butterflies years from now,
I'll make every second count when I'm with you."

Prom: I Must Not Chase The Boys (Play)
... The shuffle was screwed. I swear.
Qiu got something almost as bad-- "She Blocked Me". And RJ got "Wasting My Time".
... gee whillikers. We three didn't have much of a time at prom, did we.

Mental Breakdown: Chasing Cars (Snow Patrol)
... Running around in traffic? Yeah, Cara, you're headed for the looney house fo' sho.

Driving: Think Twice (Eve 6)
"when all is said, and done, and dead
does he love you the way I do
breathing in lightning, tonight's for fighting
I feel the hurt, so physical

think twice 'fore you touch my girl
come around I'll let you feel the burn
think twice 'fore you touch my girl
come around, come around; no more."

Flashback: Face Down (Red Jumpsuit Apparatus)
"cover up with makeup in the mirror
tell yourself it's never gonna happen again
you cry alone and then he swears he loves you."

Wedding: We're All In This Together (HSM)
... Wth? Uh, no. Nobody is gonna make me walk down the aisle to that one.

Birth of Child: Do You Want To (Franz Ferdinand)
... Hell yeah.

Final Battle: From The Inside (Linkin Park)
"I won't trust myself with you,
I won't waste my time on you,
Won't waste my time on you."

Death Scene: The Kill (30 Seconds To Mars)
... Whoa. Appropriate, much.

Funeral: Over (Lindsay Lohan)
... Sure is.

End credits: First Day Of The Rest Of Our Lives (MxPx)
"I’m gonna chase my dreams and catch up to them
I’m gonna find you some how, some way, somewhere, some day
First day of the rest of our lives, and I miss you already
Last time I saw that look in your eyes, and I miss you already. "
****

so later we moseyed down to Holland V, in our pajamas and our Tinkerball fluffy cap and Minnie and Mickey ears.
we got lots of curious glances and smiles along the way.
one time, when we were at the busstop, some bus drove by and all the heads in the bus turned simultaneously to look at us. Every single head.
It was a riot.

We wanted our ritual Frolick with Ben.
... but Ben wasn't available. ):
So we went for our Frolick instead.

"mmm omigosh this is yogasmic!"

we all have a weakness; and some of ours are easier to identify.
yeah look down. no prizes for guessing.

...aaaand us being totem poles. Probably the cutest ones you'll ever see.
Duh.

I love you two-- we'd trump the Sleepover Club anyday.

"let's run away to a place where the air tastes like rain and the sun shines like Sunday morning.
You bring your laugh and I'll bring my sense of humor,
and we can taste the days, one week after another."

fluffy bedroom slippers and teddy bears and unicorns;
pink flannel nightgowns and crumpled boyfriend shirts,
four o'clock in the afternoon sees us rolling on the floor laughing
and hurling feather pillows like only sixteen year olds can

strumming guitars to twentieth century love songs, we
don't need happily ever after, we've got each other, and
the way your eyes sparkle in the sunlit polaroid is music to me

this town is too small for us; we'll take it by storm,
we've got faith and trust and pixie dust
and our laughter to keep us warm,
we've got a big old plan to change this big old world
and these people are none the wiser,
and these people are none the wiser,

yeah, these people won't know what hit them.

Sunday, March 9, 2008

hello, old friend. 6:19 AM

you're pretty like a portrait of a garden in bloom
but you're tragic like a song that will end far too soon;
----

Band[Age], yesterday.

Maxy and I sat on the benches in the MG concourse for half an hour, with Maxy eating seaweed for dinner and me draped over the sides of the benches and the both of us waiting for Amanda because she had our tickets and we couldn't get in without them.

we got a whole lotta stares.
Maybe it's cuz we're just hot, or maybe it's cuz our statuses're now ex-MG-moved-to-NJ; but I'm suspecting it's the latter.
(although why yes, we are rather hot, kthankyou.)

Just being in MG made me realize- with alarming clarity- just how different MG is from NJ.
I mean; over there in MG, every concert thing's sortuv like some kinduv social event. With, like, the MG girls on their AC boyfriends' arms and everyone dressed up to the nines, and all.
... When NJ has concerts on; everyone turns up in fbts and their pe shirts and if you show up in your uniform, then well- that's pretty darn formal already.

not comparing, though.
apples and oranges.

spent some time yelling after some prefect whom I swore was a deadringer for Jia Ni, got annoyed when I got no response even after yelling myself hoarse; then realized later on that she wasn't Jia Ni after all. hohum.

saw Maxy's famed Abraham. Whoaaa that guy is huge.
And I thought the NJ canoeists were buff.

went around meeting up with the mg girls! and was coerced into buying a cinnamon doughnut. I haven't eaten doughnuts in eeeeeonnnssss. But it was good.

dorothy: "omigosh Cara you lost weight!"
me: "um. no."
dorothy: "yes! *circles around*"
me: *feels like a showhorse*
dorothy: "... you did! you did!"
me: "well that's weird. cuz I've been eating pretty much whatever the hell I want."

maybe I do have something like a metabolism, after all.
buuuut I don't have NJ uniform to thank for that. I still look like an oversized dormouse.
I swear, tis only in normal clothes that I start to look vaguely humanesque.

I HEART ONE HOT MINUTTTTEEEE.
Amanda, Maxy and I were probably the only girls down there hopping up and down and screaming, "go NJ! goooo EN-JAYYYYY!"

I give up; photobucket only lets me upload these two pictures to scale.

today I was woken up rudely by the sound of the phone ringing.
and I was all, "grrrrr", cos I was in the middle of a very nice dream in which I had just met Jacob Black and his family and I had just said, "oh, hi".

darn you, phone. ):

the rest of the day went wunnerfully, though. Mummy and Jansies and I had a girls' day out-- absolutely fantaaasssstique.
My favourite pieces were my white Grecian-esque day gown, vintage lingerie sets (sorrry, I have ze weakness), my Dorothy shoes (only in charcoal), sundresses and my chandelier shell earrings.
Everything I got, I adored. And vice versa.

sorry, Daddy, for the bill. :/

note: I don't do this all the time, though. no, really.

okay ~~sleep~~dayover with RJ and Qiu tomorrow! (!!)
yaye chickflicks.

I cannot wait.

<3

Thursday, March 6, 2008

hello, old friend. 5:38 AM

walking down hallways never seemed so bright;
-----

it's strange.

I'd bet we could spend all day in school and still have the awesomest of times.
we've all laughed our abs into existence.

Kat: it's not my fault I thought like that! Qiu osmosized onto me. I swear.

RJ made a rawr face today and I started laughing real hard and I was about to thwack my hand on the canteen table and laugh some more; but I was laughing so hard that I did a very unglam "whoaaa" with my arms spinning like pinwheels
and fell off the bench.

And I quote RJ's blog:
"and that made Qiu Lin laugh so loudly that the guy from the next table stared at me with the oh-my-God-is-that-your-friend look. Hahaha YES SHE IS."
... So for all of five minutes-- having regained my balance, I sat there indignantly watching RJ and Qiu shaking with laughter.

Five minutes.

... Huh. Some friends.

Then when Yan came back from the watercooler; the three of us ambushed her by surrounding her and doing a little impromptu caveman dance around her in a circle, singing Hellogoodbye's "Will You Go To Prom With Me" in our schmexy deep jock voices:
"will you go to prom with me
and dance and dance, and dance and dance, and dance..."
but then those big wide eyes of hers got even bigger and wider and she looked like she was about to cry so we stopped.
Sorry, Yan. :/

Later on, the three of us were reminiscing about Coffee Bean's Eggs Ben (which is to dieeee for) and Frolick's frozen yogurt. Mmm.

RJ: I miss Bennnn!
Qiu: ... Mmmm. Bennn.
Cara: We wanna Frolick with Ben! *grins*
Leonard (who happens to be sitting next to us at the moment): *one eyebrow goes all the way upppp* ... Come-again-you-wanna-whaat?

... Today I curled up on the sofa and watched every single bit of Troy.
I want to marry a man like Achilles. Or Hector.
I'm torn between the two--
one golden, godlike, burning out in some glorious white flame of sacrifice;
the other with dark hair and such dark, dark eyes; so noble, so good.

mum cried.
so did the both of my maids.

... I didn't.
but it was so beautiful it made my heart ache.

"you say you're willing to die for love
but you know nothing about dying
and you know nothing about love."

Tuesday, March 4, 2008

hello, old friend. 6:15 AM

look at you, you well-dressed hypocrite;
yeah, just because you can spell love
doesn't mean you should say it so much.
------

today was spent comfortably revising for Differentiation on Thursday, and Popper and Hume and Kuhn on Wednesday, and sourcing out new Within Temptation songs.
... I fell in love with "What Have You Done Now" the moment I heard it.
It's gorrrrrrgeous. Definitely on my recommended listening list this week.

RJ: You can be the witch with the wart on her nose.
Cara: ...
RJ: You can be the dumb witch.
Cara: (dumb witch) I'm a ditch. *giggles*
RJ: *thinks* No...in that case, then you're a bad witch.
Cara: O_O You did not just call me that!
RJ: *smirks* You're a bad witch. Bad witch.
Cara: And you're a feathery duck.

if you don't get it then you're just slow.

... I didn't know we've got a weeklong holiday next week.
Go me!
Omigosh high time to hit the streets.

1. sleepover with RJ and Qiu
2. sleepover with Maxy and Ting
3. sleepover with Kat
4. mosaic music festival with the oc clan!
5. coffee date
6. dinner
7. retail therapyyyyy. kay 'nuff said.

I'm pretty sure there's more.
But I'll update once Ass. Week's well and over-- lists make me happy.

hey you're starting to creep me out
and read ~~my lips~~ the screen-- going on holiday with you is a big N-O. kthx.

I'm so sleepy, so so sleepy
maybe I should get an early night tonight

Sunday, March 2, 2008

hello, old friend. 3:04 AM

[/EDIT!]

okay omigosh I totally promise y'all a completely emo-free, happy bunny post once 'zams end.
...pinky promise.

I've been scrolling through Elemm's blog and I absolutely adore her posts. I miss that girl- note to self: catch up soon.
And maybe it's no coincidence that she's feeling the same way I am right now.

... Digressing.

1. I NEED to go out to watch a movie.
... no, it's not even a "want" situation. It's a need. Like, honestly. The last movie I watched in the cinema was Enchanted.
Which was absolutely awesome but it was aaaages ago.
Omigosh, like, back in December.
:/
I feel old.
But point being. Everyone else's watched Jumper and P.S I Love You, etcetra, and gawsh I cannot wait for Prince Caspian and The Spiderwick Chronicles and Twilight (!!) to come out,
and Peter Jackson-- just when're you gonna finish making The Hobbit?

2. Um, I kinda need to study.
But moving on.

3. I want a stayover!
... the real kind; the awesome girly kind with fluffy bedroom slippers and the teddies we had when we were six and icecream straight from the tub and girly movies all night long.
If my calculations're right-- I'm gonna have three scheduled; so woohoo!

4. maybe I should start on my stories again.
I swear, at this rate, my English is going to wither and crumple up and dieeeee.
Honestly-- all the poor characters walking around in my head must be dying by now; I haven't taken them out and talked to them for ages.

5. I am supposed to train my little brother for his PFT.
... ohemgee major feat, much.

6. I owe RJ and Qiu frozen yogurt!
Okay, so I don't-- but I want an excuse to go back to Frolick; so the yogurt's on me.
... We stay hard longer. Ohmygosh the cracks we come up with. We're gonna make our Yogurt Song into a Yogurt Video and we'll become celebrities the world over, yo.

Ass. Week starts tomorrow-- with trigo, no less.
Trigo will be the death of me; I swear-- I cannot prove equations.
Anyhow. Hopefully my patient revision would've paid off-- but if, in the end, it doesn't... then whateverrr. Nuffink else I can do about it.

Because honestly, Trigo; I don't know what else to do with you.
I've been spending a whole lot of time with you everyday just trying to get to know you better; to figure you out--
and I have been trying so hard to prove you right, and to understand you.
So if that means absolutely nothing to you,
then, well.
I'm afraid I can't be friends with you any more.

moving on.

the weather lately has been brilliant.
okay so maybe not really brilliant in the true sense of the word.
the weather lately has been cloudy and grey and cold.

which is fine by me.

"oh mister sun, sun; mister golden sun
please don't shine on me,"

Monday--
c'mere and get some!

hello, old friend. 1:48 AM

and the shadow of your smile will linger;
it will linger, linger, longer
-----

Okay.
I'm finally blogging in words again-- so no complaints, please.

I was ABOUT to type out some happy zippydeedoodah post-- buuut then I happened to sign into my old email account, and read through a coupluv old emails. Aaaand I found out a few things I hadn't realized, when I first read those messages.
Biiiig mistake, Cara.
Why d'you always have t'go and put your foot in things?!

it kills me how I cannot- have never been able to- get over this.
it frustrates me no end how it haunts me like this-- I am certain it was never meant to be like this.

and even now the guilt remains
even now the guilt remains

if the world was going to end, the phonebooths would be crammed with people dialling home to say "i love you" and "i'm sorry" and "i miss you"
and I would be standing outside with a phonecard with my eyes on heaven.

I wish I could dial some kind of celestial phone number,
sob "I am so sorry" into the other line
just before the world shifts and shatters into a million million little pieces
of flying fragments and telephone numbers left in the washing machine

I wish I could take every word back.

hanging upside down from a tree and laughing,
I remember;

show me you're as real as he tells me you are.
show me you're still near.
show me you've forgiven me.

are you watching over me
from where you are?