Tuesday, April 22, 2008
hello, old friend.
6:29 AM
you said hello where the hell have you been?
I said I feel like I've been off to war and may never be the same again.
----today is tuesday and already I am tired. "are you all right? you don't seem like yourself today."yeah yeah yeah, I'm fine, I'm good. how could I not be? I've been giving you the benefit of the doubt all this while, today I needed answers so I tested the waters-- you had your chance and you blew it. you can say you've got good intentions but talk's just talk and talk's cheap, saw what you were trying to sell me in the cornerstore going for one ninety nine. it's what you do not what you say, sweetheart;you said to keep a little light on but my electricity bill's been rising,I love you still but honestly right now I'm not impressed. moving on, moving on. so XC nationals're tomorrow and right now, I'm not scared not apprehensive not nervous not anything,my game plan?: run and get it over with. my shins (yeah, plural; how awesome'm I?) have been giving me crud and honestly right now I couldn't care less. I'm sick of going around with a dumb bandage on my leg and I'm sick of people telling me that no, I shouldn't be running, it isn't good for me, calcium pills I never take and the ultrascan I'll probably never go for. so no fear. tomorrow I will go there and I will run and it's gonna hurt like hell butI will cross that finish lineI willI will;God be with me as I do this. NJC XC-- c'mon, c'mon. all of you are such strong people and yeah, all it takes is all we've got so let's go there and let's bring it on. we're bringing XC back. go team! wednesday thursday friday saturday saturday saturdaysink down into the lavender-scented duvets and breathe old comforts in, chocolate milk before bedtime and my jesus chair beside my bed,well my thoughts might be lonely but they beat all and any late night conversation. okay now Ethan's asking me if I'm all right,time to face the worldpull back your fringe and everything will be okaylive through this and you'll never turn backlive through this and you'll never turn back.