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♥ precious.
la bella vita;

Cara

loves: black and white photography. poetry. vintage stores. thunderstorms. good ambience. fairytales. disneyworld. black kohl and fuschia lipstick. red and purple skittles. turquoise beads. icing but not cakes. might-have-beens. the dandy warhols. within temptation. automatic loveletter. mediaeval baebes. troy. interview with a vampire. the oc. making 11:11 wishes. purple glitter. mermaids. my-little-ponies. magic.

expertise: melodramaticks. eyeliner. laughing. goodbyes. hanging in there.

♥ music on, world off.
shh.

soundtrack to life.

♥ scream(?).
live.

♥ past .
instant time travel

December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010

♥ adieu .
set them free

AMANDA
ANDRE
ASH
DEB
ELEMM
07IP04!
08IP04!
JOSH
KAT
LISA
QIU
RENJEAN


♥ credits .
thankyouverymuch

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Sunday, April 19, 2009
hello, old friend. 7:14 AM



(warning: incoherency ahead)

"i don't know how i feel any more"

Not sad, just hollow.

My day has passed in a blur of unwise 5kms and bottoms of plates and me wishing i could have it in handwriting too..., and econs and pi and more econs and "you haven't taken your pills why haven't you taken your pills" and
ASOIUAS)(*W)E(Q>A:LDKALJADSr0w38.

Lisa, your latest post puts a lump in my throat and I don't know why.

maybe I should let Friday spell backlit catastrophe.
...but even mayhem takes so much effort to plan. and I'm tired. so tired.
all I want to do is pull the covers over my head and sleep away the cymbalic words like whitehot calf brands on skin the tentative whisperings to dark air that made me realize that no, i don't and i am so sorry..., the ocean behind my eyes the smoke signals that turn to confused laughter when friends come round
the fraying rope
the gravity.

give me a few days and I should snap out of this--
yes; I am aware of the fact that I am unattractively sliding around in indulgent self-pity. I landed myself in there, thanks.

Cass calls it my "Sylvia Plath complex".
I call it
stupid.



please, somebody.


screw this, Cara- fight back.