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♥ precious.
la bella vita;

Cara

loves: black and white photography. poetry. vintage stores. thunderstorms. good ambience. fairytales. disneyworld. black kohl and fuschia lipstick. red and purple skittles. turquoise beads. icing but not cakes. might-have-beens. the dandy warhols. within temptation. automatic loveletter. mediaeval baebes. troy. interview with a vampire. the oc. making 11:11 wishes. purple glitter. mermaids. my-little-ponies. magic.

expertise: melodramaticks. eyeliner. laughing. goodbyes. hanging in there.

♥ music on, world off.
shh.

soundtrack to life.

♥ scream(?).
live.

♥ past .
instant time travel

December 2007
January 2008
February 2008
March 2008
April 2008
May 2008
June 2008
July 2008
August 2008
September 2008
October 2008
November 2008
December 2008
January 2009
February 2009
March 2009
April 2009
May 2009
June 2009
July 2009
August 2009
September 2009
October 2009
November 2009
December 2009
January 2010
February 2010

♥ adieu .
set them free

AMANDA
ANDRE
ASH
DEB
ELEMM
07IP04!
08IP04!
JOSH
KAT
LISA
QIU
RENJEAN


♥ credits .
thankyouverymuch

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Image: 03
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Brushes: 07 08 09 10
Fonts: 11

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Monday, January 25, 2010
hello, old friend. 5:16 AM

"and so I go, into the great Perhaps"
----


There are many kinds of love in the world.
And when you find that one is not for you; you learn to lean- gently, tentatively- on the others.

This love is good.
God has given me beautiful, beautiful friends. You know who you are- thank you, all of you, for your warmth and support and the tender hands you're using to hold me up. 

Last night was horrible. I gave up the one thing I had tried to hold onto, and then and only then did they take me, crying softly shoulders shaking, into their bed. 
I don't know whether to feel comforted or repulsed.
And yet with all the drifting loneliness, the sudden, occasional rushing of air from my ribcage and the currents behind empty lids
there is a sad, sweet sense of relief.

At least the way now is clear.
I would have fought every inch of the thorny road, 
but at least now the way is clear, and that is a small mercy.

You can breathe again. I don't want you to hurt any more.

Who knows where we stand, in our Book of Days?
Maybe One Day. Maybe never. Maybe Neverland. Maybe Everland, maybe Evermore.



You and I know we loved.
And that is all that needs to be written.